edward "tiny bara" elric. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
equivalences) wrote2014-12-03 03:26 pm
equivalences) wrote2014-12-03 03:26 pm
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ELRIC.EDWARD@cdc.org
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ELRIC.EDWARD@cdc.org
(0) UNREAD MESSAGES
email | audio calls | face-to-face appointments
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That's terrible. I need to check up on other people.
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
Her name's Mai. Long back hair, thin, constantly looks like she's bored out of her mind? Sound familiar?
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FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
Don't think I saw her. Who is she -- your sister?
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No!
[ whoa there that's awfully defensive. ]
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
She's my gir
[ wait, that's not right either. ]
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
My ex-girlfriend.
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FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
You had a girlfriend once? [ and why does ed sound so incredulous ]
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FROM: zuko@cdc.org
Why do you sound so surprised?!
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FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
Well, you're kinda --
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What???
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
Girls like me just fine!
[ Back home, this was surprisingly true?? Probably, no definitely, because he's a prince. ]
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Look. You'll never not be the Prince of the Sewer Nation to me. [ So you can't blame him for having a bad first impression. ]
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THAT WAS FOREVER AGO
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It's kinda hard to shake off such a colourful first impression.
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Oh yeah, what about you? I can't imagine you've got girls lining up for a chance.
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FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE --
FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
Girls just don't like intellectuals! That's the only reason! [ This was painful to write. ]
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Sure, sure.
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
Wait.
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
Have you ever had a girlfriend?
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Is that any of your business?!?
FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
I'm a man of science! As if I've got time for that crap. [ Another embarrassing text brought to you by E.Elric. ]
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You asked about my love life, why can't I ask about yours?!
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
That's pathetic. You don't think anyone actually believes that, do you?
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I didn't ask about it!!!!
FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
Shut up! How should I know why girls don't like me? They're weird!
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Yes you did!
[ he doesn't actually remember... maybe ed didn't
oh, he kinda feels bad now... ]
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
I won't argue with that. Girls are pretty weird.
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
Have you ever liked one?
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FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
That's ... none of your business too.
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What's her name?
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I said it's none of your business!!!!!
[ After a pause. ]
FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
Winry. We were kids. [ He totally doesn't still like her, nope. ]
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I'm just trying to help you!!!
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
Do you still know her?
[ for someone as dense as this guy is, he's actually reading between the lines pretty well right now.. ]
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Yeah. We're still friends.
FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
She was my automail mechanic back home.
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FROM: zuko@cdc.org
I think I can help you.
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
With how to talk to girls, I mean.
[ Hoe don't do it
HE DONT KNOW SHIT............................................................... WHY WOULD YOU EVER ]
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Ed regards this offer with some mild interest, but he makes a point not to sound too eager. He doesn't want to look like a pathetic loser. ]
FROM: elric.edward@cdc.org
Yeah? How do you plan to do that?
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How else? By teaching you, stupid.
FROM: zuko@cdc.org
It'd be a lot easier since you're just talking to another guy.
[ nothing about this is homo. nothing at all ]
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idek
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wtf...
WTF
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